Several months ago (well I think it was that long anyway) when I was at my wits end with connor and venting to robin, she said that ce wasn't looking for a friend right now, what he really needed was for me to be firm and discipline him (something along those lines), he needed me to continue being the strong steady mom---you know the mom I use to be. Admittedly, I am sure that some of the behavioral issues I've been having with connor are really MY fault- and not just the situation we're in now/the change in our lives or the age. I've become inconsistent and giving in too much-- I have this great fear that he'll decide he hates me one day and want to go live with his dad instead of staying with me. I know that's crazy talk.. and something I don't even need to think about till he's like.. 16 and moody LOL.
Anyway.. we were having a *really* really bad day yesterday. He lost his movies (he earns one every other day), he lost his smart cycle, I was about to start taking things out of his room .. LOL .. really bad day.. he kept pushing and pushing, but I stayed firm.. I told him he wasn't going to disrespect me any more and just kept putting him back in his room and told him when he was ready to behave and act like a big boy he could come out and talk to me.
This went on for a while.. lately-- as in the past few months-- I've been so awful about being consistent. He'd scream and yell at me and say but I wanted to follow directions, and I cave and don't stick to his punishment. Obviously this was the wrong plan-- as he was just getting worse and worse. Today, was the last straw though...... no more of the weenie mommy.
Several hours later,he was calm, his chores were done.. he was being super super helpful and sweet.. and he says "Mom I have something to tell you... " expecting something goofy and ridiculous like normal I prepared for something weird like.. dog cats have lemur tails-- but he said.. "I want to tell you something... Mom... you're a great mom.. You're doing good.. don't be sad or mad or sad or anything anymore ok?? I want you to be HAPPY.. you are GREAT and I love you forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever."
**aww kid**
Every once in a while ce comes out with these beautiful things.. and I am just truly blessed to have such an amazing kid.. So I guess what I'm saying is.. 1) I love my kid lol but 2) Robin really was right all those months ago. What the kid wants.. what the kid needs is for me to just buck up and be the "mean" mommy while I have to.. He NEEDS the rules.. he WANTS the structure.. and well, I'll keep giving it to him then :)
Anyway.. we were having a *really* really bad day yesterday. He lost his movies (he earns one every other day), he lost his smart cycle, I was about to start taking things out of his room .. LOL .. really bad day.. he kept pushing and pushing, but I stayed firm.. I told him he wasn't going to disrespect me any more and just kept putting him back in his room and told him when he was ready to behave and act like a big boy he could come out and talk to me.
This went on for a while.. lately-- as in the past few months-- I've been so awful about being consistent. He'd scream and yell at me and say but I wanted to follow directions, and I cave and don't stick to his punishment. Obviously this was the wrong plan-- as he was just getting worse and worse. Today, was the last straw though...... no more of the weenie mommy.
Several hours later,he was calm, his chores were done.. he was being super super helpful and sweet.. and he says "Mom I have something to tell you... " expecting something goofy and ridiculous like normal I prepared for something weird like.. dog cats have lemur tails-- but he said.. "I want to tell you something... Mom... you're a great mom.. You're doing good.. don't be sad or mad or sad or anything anymore ok?? I want you to be HAPPY.. you are GREAT and I love you forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever."
**aww kid**
Every once in a while ce comes out with these beautiful things.. and I am just truly blessed to have such an amazing kid.. So I guess what I'm saying is.. 1) I love my kid lol but 2) Robin really was right all those months ago. What the kid wants.. what the kid needs is for me to just buck up and be the "mean" mommy while I have to.. He NEEDS the rules.. he WANTS the structure.. and well, I'll keep giving it to him then :)