So, I was standing in the kitchen making dinner.. listening to ce having yet another blow up in his room. He had just gotten in trouble for drawing all over my floors. He starts going through the usual routine, I promise to be a good boy, I promise to be a big boy, I promise to not do naughty things anymore, I promise to keep my mommy happy.. on and on. And I started thinking.. about all the other false promises I've received in my life. It seems there have been a lot of them.. why do people promise so many things they can't fulfill? I'm pretty sure that you're born that way.. with this uncontrollable urge to please, so you just spit out any promise you think will satisfy the other person (case and point, my 5 yr old promising things that he will break within the hour). There are the small ones.. like those above.. to the whopper ones from adults- you know, the I promise to love you forever, I promise there's no one else, I promise to love honour and respect you till death do us part.. and my favorite .. I don't believe in divorce, I promise to never leave you. I know I'm guilty of them sometimes too.. this isn't a I hate men post (though I'm feeling particularly cynical at this moment in time).. Why do we do this? and furthermore.. why do we accept promises that we know there's no way that the other person can be sure to keep? I know.. sometimes.. those till death do us part things do work out, and I'm not upset that that was one of those promises in my life that I was let down on- I came to terms with the path my life took long ago now- but I believed it then... and I am tired of believing and being let down. I think I need to make it a point from here on out to request no one promise me anything anymore :p lest I truly become that cranky bitter cat woman in the future. I have so little hope and faith in people it's disgusting to me. I want to believe people when they say.... they promise they'd never hurt me, and that they'd be the first person to kick their own a** if they were ever a certain way to me.. but I don't really anymore. I am always expecting the people in my life to turn out like everyone else I've dealt with in the past- which is unfair to them of course. I go round and round (as my close friends can attest to, it's tiring) I'll be high on a cloud, and then the next day I've crashed back down assuming everyone is evil. That's no way to live.. NOT everyone is evil. My kid certainly isn't evil for promising he won't be a bad boy.. and neither are the other people in my life who promise to stick around through it all. I don't know.. That was the extent of my thoughts.
/cranky la rantings.
/cranky la rantings.
